The remake isn't just a remake of the first installment, but instead a remake of the first three films. Sort of. We very briefly see Jason's mother (Nana Visitor) at the start of the film, only to cut forward a few decades to catch up with the now-adult Jason (Derek Mears). A group of friends are spending the week at one of their dad's cabins by the lake. All is well until Clay (Jared Padalecki) and Jenna (Danielle Panabarker) discover Camp Crystal Lake. And any guesses who lives at Camp Crystal Lake? Yep, it's our good friend Jason, who's grown up to become a deranged serial killer armed with a machete, as well as a few other goodies he finds. So yeah, like the slasher films of old, everybody is pretty much fucked in this modern day retelling of Jason's violent story.
Now twenty-five minutes into the movie, the title finally appears on screen, and the film's actual plot kicks in. This is a ninety minute film we're talking about, so the fact that it's not until the twenty-five minute mark that the plot kicks in is not a good sign. And as the film goes on, we get to see just how underdeveloped the plot really is. There's a bunch of characters partying and getting killed, and there's really only one character who I remotely cared about. But that's Friday the 13th for you. Same complaints with every movie.
And fun they are. The murders in this film have never been so brutal. From bear traps to dear antlers to a crossbow, Jason is constantly finding creative ways to brutalise his victims, and brutalising has never been so entertaining. Well, technically it has, but shut up. I'm trying to defend this movie. Right from the (second) opening sequence of the film, you know you're in for a treat. It's got violence. It's got sex. It's got bad acting. It's got cheesy dialogue. It's got one mandatory black guy who will die at some point in the film. It checks off all the requirements of a Friday the 13th movie and the rest of the film follows this exact same path. It's just a lot of fun.